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How Couples Going Through Infertility Treatment Can Celebrate Valentine’s Day

Learn how to make Valentine's Day feel special no matter where you are in your fertility journey

February 13, 2019
Bridget Houlihan

As you and your partner are already aware, going through infertility treatment is long journey-- but one that you make together. Sometimes that journey is made even more difficult with doctor’s appointments, prescriptions, and other additional expenses. By the time February 14th rolls around, the two of you are either too preoccupied-- or too exhausted-- to make much effort into celebrating. But it doesn’t have to be that way! Valentine’s Day can be a special day just for the two of you, to reconnect and remember why you fell in love with each other in the first place.

Couples going through infertility treatment don’t have to be left out on Valentine’s Day, so here are a couple of options for you to try this year:

  • Appreciate the little things
  • Concentrate on the sensual
  • Remember to be thankful

Appreciate the Little Things

It can be easy to forget that you as a couple are on the journey of infertility treatment together, and that neither of you have to go at it alone. This is a great time of year-- when love is in the air-- to remember why you started down this path in the first place: because you love each other. Don’t worry about how the media says you should celebrate Valentine’s Day-- with expensive gifts and champagne-- but concentrate instead on the two of you.

By all means go ahead and make a date, but make it where you feel comfortable. If that means on the couch and watching your favorite movie, that’s just fine. Who says you have to spend a lot of money on gifts either, when you can easily just take a walk together, or listen to your favorite music. This can be a nice, relaxing holiday that you two get to spend together.

a bouquet of tulips with a card reading happy valentines day
No need for expensive gifts, leave love notes around the house for your valentine to discover!

Concentrate on the sensual

As we get closer to Valentine’s Day, it seems that the media likes to concentrate on the sexual side of the holiday as opposed to the sensual side. But this year, concentrate on the love and comfort you both bring each other while you’re undergoing fertility treatment. Instead of rushing into things, take it slow. Start by holding hands or cuddling on the couch. A massage is another great way to bring some sensuality to your Valentine’s Day. And while you enjoy your day, make it a point to not bring up any fertility talk. This is the time to concentrate on your enjoyment of each other, not your trouble conceiving.

A sculpture depicting two hearts alongside a river. Love locks have been clasped to the metal sculpture
Take time on Valentine’s Day to be thankful for each other!

Remember to be thankful

It can seem like a difficult thing to do while you’re in infertility treatment, but maintaining a positive outlook and taking into account what you do have goes a long way. When you’re thankful for all the wonderful things you do have, it’s easier to remember that you and your partner are a team, and you can accomplish anything. If you want, make a list together of all the things you’re grateful for.

a heart shaped pillow that reads you are not alone on a stone patio
Take the time to remember you and your partner are a great team, and can get through anything together!

When February 14th comes around this year, make it a special time for your and your partner to remember what really matters on this journey you’re on. Celebrate in your own way, and do what makes the two of you happy!


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